The most underrated cause of relationship problems is missed bids for connection. Presence is how partners regulate each other and share love. Eye contact, responsiveness, and shared attention signal safety, interest, and importance. Without it, partners begin to feel emotionally alone — even while together. Over time, repeated missed bids create subtle disconnection. One partner stops reaching out. The other becomes defensive or unaware. Emotional distance replaces closeness. Sustained intimacy
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