Enjoy more funny stories from Not Always Right! | Not Always Right

The restaurant I work for is in a very small town, and as such, we have a devoted group of elderly regulars that are allowed to have a tab because we see them everyday. One day one of the regulars walks in, hands me a blank check, and tells me to hang it up with his tab. | Not Always Right

Me: "Sure thing. What size does your daughter wear?" (Note that we do not have a foot measure, and the daughter isn't even in the store with her.) Customer: "I don't know." Me: "Neither do I." *laughs* | Not Always Right

Customer: "But you know what the worst job in the world is?" Me: "What?" Customer: "Translator." Me: "A translator? Why?" Customer: "Because the government kills them." | Not Always Right

Customer: "You can't force me to wear a mask!" Me: "You're right, but that means we don't have to serve you. Please leave." Customer: "There are no signs saying I need to wear a mask!" Me: "You literally passed four of them on the way in, including the front door." | Not Always Right

Customer: "NO! NO! I wanted that vegetarian slice!" (He points to the slice of pepperoni.) | Not Always Right